- Don’t assume you’re committed because you’re dating. That’s the whole thing about courtship. You’re chasing her and trying to woo her into choosing you. If she’s the goddess you want in your life in a monogamous manner, you need to ask her for that commitment. If you have not asked her, assume she’s dating other men. She has no reason not to do so. She needs to pick the best man that comes correct with the question, “will you be my girlfriend?” – just like in 7th
- Come with a piece of jewelry. If you have the means, get her a Cartier Love Bracelet of some sort. Women love those these days. If you don’t, it really doesn’t matter. Go to Macy’s and get a payment plan and necklace with diamonds of some sort. If you’re in the Bay Area, go to the San Francisco Gift & Jewelry Center. There are tons of baubles there for affordable prices. The key is: don’t go it alone. You can book a discovery call with me, and I can guide you through this entire process (including the gift, based on your means). Or you can ask her best friend, sister, one of your close girlfriends with good fashion sense (if you have female friends) or a male friend that’s clued into fashion/jewelry somehow. Some women would love a little necklace from Tiffany’s, and some would think that’s not chic enough. Regardless, the point is: you’re communicating that you are invested in her by asking for a commitment with a piece of jewelry in hand. Even if you don’t end up with the perfect piece, it shows you mean the words you’re asking (versus just finding a way to get her into bed – if she’s a wise woman that only sleeps with men to whom she’s committed – but that’s a whole another story for another article).
- Ask her with confidence. Tell her the qualities you like about her and that you’d like her to be yours. It’s sexy and romantic, not toxic masculinity. Conversation Hearts (remember those cute little candies) have “be mine” on them for a reason. It’s adorable. If she says yes and you double down with the jewelry, she’ll melt in your arms and also feel like she can trust your words, because you’ve planned ahead and have invested in her. Remember, the key is to make her feel at ease around you.
- Be obsessed with her. Don’t play it cool. It’s cool to care. Don’t smother her or be stage 5 clinger about it but be adoring of her. Say the compliments you think in your mind aloud. Get her flowers just because she’s special to you. Text her and call her. If she likes you, she will love that.
- This is the first phase of sealing the deal. One of the programs I offer is related directly to the courtship phase. You’ve officially leveled up and out of that, once she’s girlfriend status. Keep being romantic and keep being interested in getting to know her on a deeper level. I offer Masterclasses that cater to the next step – getting to I do. I believe that it’s very reasonable to date someone and get engaged, and then ultimately married, in one year. Women don’t have endless time like you do. Besides, if you’re paying attention and working with me or with a therapist, you will be paying close attention to who they truly are and if they’re the right fit for you. If she is, you’ll know, and you don’t need to take 4 years of her life to figure that out. It’s a turnoff and disrespectful to her biological clock and goals in life. Plus, it’s more fun to move swiftly and to leave bitterness out of the equation. Book a discovery call if you do want marriage one day, and I will help you seal that deal!
